Monday 15 September 2014

The Banana Tree - Milton Keynes

As Mrs P and The Child will confirm without a moments hesitation or fear of reprisal, I do not like surprises. Surprises are not fun, surprises are not exciting and surprises invariably lead to someone getting upset or drunk, usually both and probably not in that order. This is doubly unfortunate because Mrs P demands surprises at regular (but not predictably regular) intervals. That is not to say I don't like new experiences; I love to have new things, try new tastes and go to new places but surely it is patently obvious that all new adventures should be carefully considered and prepared for. A measure of expectation is clearly necessary for surviving life's events, isn't it?

It was in this spirit of this mentality that I turned to our smiling waitress and said:

'These herb wraps, how herby are they? I don't like herbs.'

As you can imagine, the smiled faltered a little while she paused and considered how to answer.

'Don't worry, you'll love them. They're really popular.'

Hmmm, I think I'll be the judge of that thankyouverymuch. I therefore felt forced to order them. I had feared a soggy, parsley and oregano infused slice of carbohydrate inspired, corporately approved tortilla. What I got was a lettuce leaf and a whole lot of fun!




The meat balls were beautifully crisp on the outside and moist on the inside, the Vietnamese crunchy salad was great and the fresh coriander being the 'herbs' of which the menu spoke. I bloody love coriander and this was fresh and strong as you like. It was however the dipping sauce that really brought the whole thing alive though, tangy with vinegar, sweet and hot all at the same time, it was a great balance.




Mrs P enjoyed some Satay chicken which was good. A decent portion of chicken as well meant enjoying some fresh produce that didn't seem like a token green leaf that had been unwillingly forced onto the plate. It was tasty and the satay sauce was creamy as well as providing a flavour punch. The plate also had tiny little bamboo pockets containing some sticky rice which were great fun to ping across the table at each other!

For mains I enjoyed a noodle soup




 which was fine but no different to what you can find in Wagamama. Mrs P was the one who struck gold with her crispy chicken, dressed salad, more sticky rice and odd balls.


Lovely and fresh tasting this would have been a fab continuation from my starter. Very Vietnamese (as qualified as I am to say this having read books about the subject but never actually going to the place) , this was a winner from crispy chicken top to individual prawn cracker toe.

Mrs P couldn't resist the pud menu of a gooey chocky fondant. The fresh passion fruit on top of the ice cream was really tart and played the whole thing up beautifully.


Even the camera was starting to get a bit foggy by this time so we paid up and made our weary way. The Banana Tree puts gratuity on the bill automatically which I 100% disagree with, and I very nearly asked them to take it off. I almost always give between 10 to 15% tip depending on how happy/drunk I am but for it to be assumed really does get my slow roasted goat.

So that's The Banana Tree in Milton Keynes. It is apparently the only one in the country with a dedicated bar. It's certainly the only bar that I've ever seen with personal hammocks which, while undeniably cool, do make it rather difficult to talk to other people as you swing, twist and otherwise try to haul yourself back into a sensible seating position all the while sipping on a cocktail with an amusing straw and umbrella perched on the top.

£50 quid for two including drinks (£55 with annoyingly included tip).